My Approach

Couples Counseling
I practice Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, which means that I work from the premise that we all need safe, secure, loving relationships in order to remain healthy human beings: there is no such thing as true self-sufficiency, only effective or ineffective dependence on those we love. In our society, the couple relationship is the main (sometimes the only) place we have to meet our need for emotional safety and security, and this makes it hugely important; the goodness from a healthy couple relationship cascades out into society at large by affecting not only our own well-being but that of our children, families, and anyone else who interacts with us. In the therapy room, I'm less concerned with the nitty-gritty of how a couple communicates, and I'm more concerned with helping each person feel safe and supported by their partner.

I see couples of all kinds, from married/committed to newly engaged or cohabiting. A healthy couple relationship is important, regardless of how old it is or which thresholds it has crossed.

Individual Counseling
I believe that one's perception of themselves, their life, and their worth are ultimately more important to health and happiness than are the messages we constantly receive from other people and from society at large. I'm interested to hear the story of how you came to where you are now, and in what you make of your current situation. What kinds of messages are you getting from the world around you, or from within yourself? Might some of those messages and ideas be based on "facts" that are actually assumptions you've made about yourself or about the world? I like to ask a lot of questions along these lines, in order to shift the perspective around some of those beliefs that often go unchallenged. This to me is the big benefit of a therapist: as someone who is outside of the normal flow of your life, I am in a position to question and challenge those things that might seem obvious and self-evident to you. My ultimate goal is to help you see yourself and your situation from a new angle and in a new light, to help you find a new perspective that reveals a way forward.

Religion and Spirituality
I believe that a spiritual and religious practice can be a source of profound strength and peace, just as a religious or spiritual community can be a source of great support through difficult times. Should you wish to make your faith a part of your counseling, I am happy to accomodate you.

Values Statement
In couples counseling I take a pro-commitment stance, which means that I assume that you are seeking counseling to help you stay together and that I will work towards that end until you explicitly tell me otherwise.

I am affirming of GLBT clients and couples.