Serving couples and individuals in Roseville, Shoreview, Lauderdale, Saint Paul, Falcon Heights, New Brighton, Little Canada, Arden Hills, and anywhere in the Twin Cities

Surviving Infidelity

What is infidelity?

While our society usually talks about infidelity as a purely sexual thing, it's really about going outside the relationship for something that should stay, if not exclusively then at least primarily, inside the relationship. The experience of infidelity is real not when what happened matches some textbook definition, but rather when it's felt in the gut, when feelings of hurt, anger, and betrayal threaten to overwhelm you.

My role as a counselor in working with infidelity

Infidelity generally doesn't happen in relationships where both people are feeling happy and connected: if an affair (be it sexual, emotional, or otherwise) has happened, it probably happened at least in part because the relationship needed some work on the part of both partners. In the long term, my job is to help you identify what that work is and how best to go about it in a constructive way. In the short term, though, my goal is to help both parties make sense of what happened and navigate the storm of powerful emotions that threaten the relationship.

When couples who've experienced infidelity come out successfully on the other side – and it does happen – they often see themselves as stronger than they ever were before the affair happened in the first place.

Related:

How to Build Communication

How to Build Trust